Life happens, and sometimes it happens in unkind, painful ways. But when life goes on... do you? Or do you allow yourself to hold back, never quite opening up the same way you once did because of the pain or the "lesson" of the last experience? Humanity tends to take on pain, give it a name and a face and add it to the repertoire of the "who I am" chest. This is what separates adults from children: the pain, the lack of innocence. Something that is beautiful about the mentality of a child is their openness to entering into situations without preconceived notions of how it might end up- or more importantly, notions of how bad the situation might be.
Negativity happens, sometimes far too often. When adverse situations arise you are given the opportunity to learn and grow. Though it is difficult to paint a pretty picture out of a painful one, this can serve as a silver lining to it. The ideal situation is to experience trauma, learn the lesson then let go of the pain so that you can come out on the other side a bit wiser and entirely intact. Sometimes though, when you experience something that is truly traumatic you may pass through to the other side and you may even learn the lesson along the way, but you are so innately terrified of running into the same problem again that you "handcuff" yourself to this experience. Either you perceive that you cause pain, or you experience enough pain that you want to make sure that you never EVER again go through it.
The issue here is that you no longer enter into life with an open mind, but with a fear of experiencing that particular pain again. Nothing is quite the same.
Now you are entering into all future similar instances with fear and hesitance of how it may end up, no longer entering into life with an openness to all the magical possibilities that can play out. On a deeper level you are also not trusting that you learned the lesson- you are not allowing yourself to move on. It was so painful that you want to never experience it again, but you are also not allowing it out of your sight for fear that it might creep up on you again... think about that logic for a moment.
What if you looked back on some of the most painful experiences of your life and instead of fearing that you might experience them again, you congratulate yourself for making it through with your head held high because you learned something and became a more amazing individual because of it. Then you imagine removing the handcuffs of this situation because you don't need to keep lingering on the pain, you felt the pain and that has past and you have learned the lesson at hand and thus you have liberated yourself from ever having to experience this again. Bravo! Close the chapter, heck close the damn book, and open a new one, one where you don't know the ending and open your mind to how amazing the ending could be.
Chelsea M Latham
When I was a kid my mom would occasionally refer to me as a Reverend, because I had the need to speak so passionately about just about everything. Little did she know that some day I would build a business upon sharing the wisdom that I am so passionate about. So here you go, here are some bits and bobs of thoughts strung together for your enjoyment.