Taking Control Over The Uncontrollable

Most things in life can't be controlled. It sucks. Shit happens. Sometimes in the midst of chaos all you want to do is curl up in bed and wave the white flag. Just give up. Universe, you have won. It is in these moments that all the negative thoughts you have ever had about your life come flooding in. It's like they just wait around your moat and as soon as you're weak enough they attack. At this point in the game you have successfully become the victim. The glorious victim that can now run around life shouting, "woe is me!" "you have no idea what I feel!" and all those other things that make you feel like you are special because you are suffering. But really, why would you want to be the victim when you can be the hero?

What can be controlled is your reaction to the uncontrollable. How much do you trust that all will be well? Be honest. How much do you trust that no matter what life throws at you that you will do you absolute best to make it through to the other side with a smile on your face? How much do you believe that sometimes just making it through with a smile is ENOUGH.

Every situation that comes your way brings a fork in the road, you can choose the negative or the positive. If someone is bullying you, you can give in and be bullied or you can pull in all that self love and maintain how incredible you actually are, letting the bully's words wash away. There is always a choice to be made, you can submit to the worry, fear, doubt, anger, blame and more or you can choose to reconnect with that positive light within you that is capable of conquering any tough situation.

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How do you transition into a state of greater control? 

Step One: Slow don't your reaction time! It's so easy to flare up and react on the spot to a situation, essentially living in fight or flight mode. How do you lower your level of reactivity? Practice, especially with the help of breathing exercises and meditation. When you learn to control your breath you learn to control your reactions, thoughts and emotions. The more relaxed you can keep your mind, the more you can slow down enough to acknowledge the immediate negative reactions, then quickly move on to the more productive, positive ones. 

Step 2: Cultivate more joy! The happier and more positive you are in your overall life, the easier it will be to react positively. Studies show that you can make yourself happy, if you force a laugh or a smile, it will eventually become your own. Practicing gratitude is an incredible way to cultivate happiness! The more you become aware of all that you are grateful for (and there is so much to be grateful for!) the happier you are to live your life. If every day you took time to think of five things you are grateful for I guarantee that it would become easier and easier to get out of a negative rut!

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Shit happens. Every day and to every one. Why is it that some people seem to be so much more successful at living? Because they choose to not be defined by their shit. Because they  choose to maintain their own strength and personal power through the challenging times. 

Make the choice. Become the hero.